💃🕺 THRILLER ON THE HIGH SEAS! 🚢🍹

When a 93-Year-Old With a Cane Has Better Dance Moves Than the Rest of Us! 😂🤣💀

Lord Have Mercy, Michael Jackson! We’ve Got a Situation on Deck 5! 🚨😂

Peeps!!! Gather around because I have another little adventure from our fabulous, fun-filled, slightly dysfunctional, spirit-infused cruise aboard Royal Caribbean’s Freedom of the Seas! 🚢🍹🤣

And when I say this cruise was FULL of entertainment, I don’t just mean the shows, the casino, the bars, or the people who apparently left their common sense somewhere between Miami and the Caribbean Sea!

I’m talking about the FREE entertainment that comes with a pineapple mimosa, a slice of pizza, a front-row seat, and a bunch of grown adults attempting to dance like Michael Jackson on a MOVING SHIP!

Heavens to Betsy Ross and the King of Pop himself!!! 😂💀

Now, let me set the stage for you!

Every day we were at sea, at precisely 1:00 PM, something magical happened on Deck 5, otherwise known as the Royal Promenade.

This is where all the action takes place!

You’ve got your pizza place, your coffee bar, your shops, your bars, and approximately 5,742 people walking around trying to figure out what they’re doing with their lives.

And right smack dab in the middle of all this excitement…

DANCE CLASS!!! 💃🕺

Yes, ladies and gentlemen! FREE DANCE LESSONS!

No experience necessary!

No age limit!

No rhythm required!

Bring your children! Bring your grandparents! Bring your walkers! Bring your canes! Bring your artificial hips, knees, and whatever else you’ve had replaced over the years!

JUST SHOW UP AND SHAKE WHAT YOUR MAMA GAVE YOU!!! 😂🤣

Now, because Denise and I are very responsible adults who believe in proper preparation for all cruise activities, we had developed a little routine.

Before 1:00 PM, we would make our way down to Deck 5 and stop by The Pub.

Why?

Well, because we were conducting some very important scientific research.

You see, we had decided that we were going to start at the BEGINNING of the spirits menu and work our way to the END!

Every. Single. Drink.

For educational purposes, of course.

We were basically doing a research project for the University of Royal Caribbean.

Majoring in Mixology.

Minoring in Poor Decisions.

Graduating with honors in LAUGHTER! 🍹🤣

And you can’t conduct this kind of research on an empty stomach!

SOOOOO…

PIZZA!!! 🍕🍕

We’d grab our drinks, get our pizza, and find the PERFECT table outside The Pub where we could observe the afternoon festivities.

Because if there’s one thing Denise and I enjoy more than a good cocktail, it’s PEOPLE WATCHING!

And, peeps, this was about to be better than anything on Netflix!

🎃 ENTER MICHAEL JACKSON AND THE THRILLER DANCE! 💀🧟‍♀️

Now, remember, we were cruising during Halloween week.

So naturally, the dance instructor decided everyone needed to learn Michael Jackson’s famous THRILLER DANCE!

OH. MY. LORD.

I could already tell this was going to be GOOD!

The cruise entertainment girl was absolutely fabulous! Funny, energetic, talented, and somehow able to keep a straight face while teaching a bunch of vacationing adults how to dance like zombies.

Which, let’s be real, some of these folks probably already looked like zombies after the previous night’s activities!

And remember…

IT’S A SEA DAY!

Nobody has anywhere to be!

Nobody has to drive!

Nobody has to cook!

And half the people on Deck 5 have already had three cocktails and forgotten what day of the week it is!

It’s basically an adult summer camp with unlimited pizza and a beverage package! 😂🍹

So, Denise and I are sitting there, perfectly positioned, drinks in hand, pizza within reach, taking inventory of the participants.

And OF COURSE…

I HAVE MY PHONE OUT RECORDING EVERYTHING! 📱🎥

Because you know my philosophy!

If there’s no picture or video receipts, did it REALLY happen?!

And honey, what I was about to witness needed to be documented for future generations!

🚨 HOLD THE PHONE! IS THAT GRANDMA JACKSON?! 💃🦯

As the dance class starts filling up, we notice participants of ALL ages.

Young people.

Middle-aged people.

Older people.

People who could dance.

People who couldn’t find the beat if it came up and slapped them across the forehead!

And then…

THERE SHE WAS.

In the back of the crowd.

A little lady.

WITH A CANE.

AND A VISOR.

NOT JUST ANY VISOR, PEEPS!

A BEDAZZLED VISOR TURNED SIDEWAYS!!! ✨🧢

Now, Denise and I immediately recognized her!

We had seen this same lady the night before at dinner wearing that fabulous sideways, bedazzled visor!

So we KNEW it was her!

And let me tell y’all something…

THIS WOMAN WAS NOT PLAYING AROUND!

Michael Jackson starts playing.

The instructor starts demonstrating.

And this little lady starts MOVING!

Cane in hand!

Visor sideways!

Hips shaking!

Feet moving!

AND SHE IS NOT MISSING A BEAT!!! 💃🦯🤣

Meanwhile, I’m sitting there with my mouth hanging open, wondering if she was an original backup dancer in the Thriller video!

Because, honey, SHE KNEW WHAT SHE WAS DOING!

I’m thinking…

“EXCUSE ME, MA’AM! DID MICHAEL JACKSON PERSONALLY TEACH YOU THIS DANCE?!” 😂

Now, keep in mind…

WE ARE ON A MOVING CRUISE SHIP!

I can barely walk across my own living room without tripping over absolutely NOTHING!

I fall going UP stairs!

I fall going DOWN stairs!

I’ve practically made falling an Olympic sport!

And here’s this little lady, balancing on a moving ship, holding a cane, and dancing better than half the people who still have their original knees!

I NEED TO KNOW HER SECRET!

Does she take vitamins?!

Drink special water?!

Have a secret flask in that visor?!

WHAT IS IT, WOMAN?! SHARE YOUR KNOWLEDGE!!! 😂🤣

And THEN…

We found out how old she was.

Peeps…

NINETY-THREE!!!

93 YEARS YOUNG!!! 😳👏💃

NINETY. THREE.

HEAVENS TO BETSY ROSS, DOLLY PARTON, MICHAEL JACKSON, AND THE ENTIRE CAST OF DANCING WITH THE STARS!!!

This woman was 93 years old, dancing the Thriller on a moving ship, using a cane, and wearing a bedazzled visor sideways like she owned the entire Royal Promenade!

I WAS IN LOVE WITH HER!!!

She was my new cruise HERO!

And the best part?!

SHE SHOWED UP FOR EVERY SINGLE DANCE CLASS ON EVERY SEA DAY!!!

She didn’t care what they were teaching!

Thriller?!

SHE’S THERE!

Dolly Parton’s 9 to 5 line dance?!

SHE’S THERE!

Cane?!

CHECK!

Sideways bedazzled visor?!

CHECK!

ATTITUDE?!

HONEY, SHE BROUGHT ENOUGH FOR THE ENTIRE SHIP!!! 😂💃

I could just imagine her waking up every morning, looking at the cruise schedule, and saying…

“Well, I’ve got breakfast at 9, lunch at noon, and at 1:00 I’m going down there to show these young whippersnappers how it’s DONE!”

And DONE IT SHE DID!

I mean, Dolly Parton’s singing about working 9 to 5, and this woman is 93 years old, RETIRED, ON VACATION, and STILL PUTTING IN WORK!

Dolly would have been PROUD!

I’m telling y’all, if I make it to 93, I want to be JUST LIKE HER!

Although, knowing me, I’ll probably trip over my cane, knock over the dance instructor, and take out three innocent bystanders on my way down!

Then they’ll have to announce over the ship’s intercom…

“MEDICAL EMERGENCY ON DECK 5! WOMAN ATTEMPTED THRILLER AND BECAME AN ACTUAL FALLEN ZOMBIE!” 🚨🧟‍♀️🤣

🍹 AND THEN THERE WAS THE PUB DANCER! 😂💃

Now, while I’m videoing Grandma Jackson’s fabulous performance, my little wandering eye catches ANOTHER situation happening over at The Pub!

And honey…

THIS ONE DESERVES HER OWN PARAGRAPH!

There’s this younger, middle-aged lady standing over there in her swimsuit and cover-up.

She’s got her drink.

She’s got her music.

She’s got her vacation attitude.

AND SHE IS DANCING LIKE NOBODY ON PLANET EARTH IS WATCHING HER!

Not a care in the world!

Not a bill to pay!

Not a load of laundry waiting at home!

Not a grocery list!

Not a man asking what’s for dinner!

NOTHING!

Just this woman, her cocktail, Michael Jackson, and the beautiful Caribbean Sea somewhere outside that ship!

And she is GETTING IT!!! 💃🍹

She’s not even officially IN the dance class!

She’s over there doing her OWN choreography!

The instructor is teaching Thriller.

Grandma Jackson is following directions.

And this woman at The Pub is apparently starring in her own personal music video!

I LOVE IT!!!

I’m watching her thinking…

“GIRL!!! I FEEL YOU!!! YOU GO ON WITH YOUR BAD SELF!!!” 😂🤣

Because THAT is exactly what vacation is supposed to be!

You get on that ship, leave your worries at the port, grab your favorite beverage, and let your inner child come out to PLAY!

Who cares if you can’t dance?!

Who cares if you’re wearing a swimsuit cover-up in the middle of a pub?!

Who cares if you’re 93 years old with a cane and a sideways bedazzled visor?!

YOU ARE ON VACATION!!!

AND YOU ARE LIVING YOUR BEST LIFE!!!

Meanwhile, Denise and I are sitting at our little observation station, sipping our spirits, eating our pizza, and watching the greatest unofficial entertainment Royal Caribbean has ever provided!

I mean, WHY would I pay to see a Broadway production when I can watch a 93-year-old woman do Thriller and another lady perform an interpretive cocktail dance outside The Pub?!

THIS IS FIVE-STAR ENTERTAINMENT, PEEPS!!! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

And it’s included in the price of the cruise!

😂 THE MORAL OF THIS LITTLE HIGH-SEAS DANCE PARTY…

You know, as funny as all this was, I actually learned something from watching these two women.

Life is TOO SHORT to sit around worrying about what everybody else thinks!

At 93 years old, that precious lady wasn’t sitting in a chair watching life pass her by.

SHE WAS PARTICIPATING!

She wasn’t letting her age, her cane, or a moving cruise ship stop her from having FUN!

And the lady dancing at The Pub?

She wasn’t waiting for somebody to ask her to dance!

She wasn’t worried about whether she looked silly!

SHE WAS JUST HAPPY TO BE THERE!

And isn’t that what life should be about?!

Making memories.

Laughing until your stomach hurts.

Trying something new.

Being a little ridiculous.

And occasionally embarrassing yourself in front of several hundred strangers who you will probably NEVER see again!

Because, peeps, I’m getting ready to turn 55…

I THINK! 🤔😂

And I still feel like I’m somewhere between 21 and 35!

Well, mentally anyway.

Physically, some mornings I wake up feeling like I’ve been run over by a cruise ship, backed over by a tour bus, and then dragged through the Windjammer buffet!

But if this little lady can dance at 93, I’ve got NO EXCUSE!

Although, let’s be clear…

I will STILL be sitting at The Pub with my pizza and cocktail because somebody has to document these historical events!

And you KNOW I’ve got the VIDEO RECEIPTS!!! 🎥🤣

So here’s to the 93-year-old dancing queen with the cane and sideways bedazzled visor!

Here’s to the carefree lady dancing outside The Pub!

Here’s to our fabulous dance instructor who probably deserves hazard pay for teaching Thriller to a ship full of vacationing adults!

And here’s to Denise and me, faithfully conducting our spirits-menu research while enjoying the greatest show on the high seas!

Moral of the story:

DON’T EVER GET TOO OLD TO DANCE, TOO GROWN TO BE SILLY, OR TOO WORRIED ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK TO HAVE THE TIME OF YOUR LIFE! 💃❤️

And if you’re 93 years old and can still dance to Michael Jackson on a moving cruise ship…

HONEY, YOU ARE NOT OLD!

YOU ARE A LEGEND!!! 👑💃🦯

Now, somebody pass me another slice of pizza, refill my glass, and cue up Dolly Parton!

Because apparently…

IT’S 1:00 SOMEWHERE, AND THE DANCE FLOOR IS OPEN!!! 🍕🍹💃🤣🚢

P.S. If you happen to see me at 93 years old wearing a sideways bedazzled visor, holding a cane, and dancing to Thriller on a cruise ship, PLEASE don’t call medical!

Just turn up the music, hand me a pineapple mimosa, and GET YOUR PHONE OUT!

BECAUSE WE’RE GOING TO NEED VIDEO RECEIPTS!!! 😂🤣🎥

#CruiseLife #FreedomOfTheSeas #ThrillerOnTheHighSeas #DanceLikeNobodyIsWatching #93YearsYoung #BedazzledVisor #CruiseAdventures #VideoReceipts #MakingMemories #NeverTooOldToDance #BadMistakesMakeGreatMemories #LivingMyBestLife